A Long Road Ahead
by Short Little Writer Girl
Summary: Post-Alvarez Empire arc. After the war Natsu struggles with PTSD and his burned arm, of course most of his guildmates also have PTSD after what all of them just went through. And yeah that's basically what this story is about because I suck at summaries.
1. Chapter 1

Natsu felt at ease for the first time in well over a year. Lucy's left arm slung around his shoulders helping guide him to the entrance of Magnolia. Happy, tucked in his left arm, had declared that he would never leave Natsu alone. Ever.

But even with the joy of the war being over and being back with his friends something weighed him down.

"_There's no need to apologize to Makarov. He's already dead." _That's what Zeref said. Since then it was the one thing on his mind. Natsu had already lost Igneel there was no way that Gramps could be dead too. But a part of Natsu believed what he said.

"Finally." Natsu heard Lucy say, looking up Natsu saw what she meant.

Walking inside the half destroyed guild they found Porlyusica inside hovering over an object on one of the beds in the infirmary. Walking forward Natsu saw what she was standing over. _Gramps. _

Natsu fell to his knees accidently dropping Happy and dragging Lucy down with him. Tears welled up in his eyes as he watched as the Makarov slowly sit up.

_He was alive. _Natsu walked forward ignoring the concerned voices of his guildmates and the Porlyusica's scolding tone and wrapped his arms around Makarov, finally allowing the tears to spill.

The past days had been rough as it was with healing people right and left, but that wasn't compared to the amount of injuries everyone had at the end.

"Back away." Porlyusica growled at the onlookers to see what she was doing to the fire dragon slayer. After that threatening tone they retreated, even Makarov though they were told to keep a close eye on him, all except for Happy who was allowed in the infirmary, but forced to stay out of the way.

Placing an IV into Natsu's left hand and carefully cleaning out his more minor wounds, Porlyusica wrapped his abdomen and head in bandages. Then she inspected his arm.

Natsu hissed as his right arm was barely even touched.

"Can you move it at all?" Porlyusica asked in a questioning tone while still looking at his arm, which was charred in most places but the farther up the arm the more blistered it became.

Natsu shook his head after trying to at least move his fingers. Apparently after Acnologia was defeated Natsu lost whatever adrenaline he had, and his arm became as stiff as a bored.

Porlyusica sighed and started to prepare an herbal paste she knew that healed more severe burns. But after it was done, and she started to administer it to Natsu's thumb he shifted away, and his face looked more painful then it did a second earlier.

Porlyusica set the jar of paste down onto the nightstand next to the table and grabbed a bottle of strong pain killers and a glass of water.

"Take them child, they'll help ease the pain." Porlyusica said in the softest tone she could use and handed the painkillers into his palm and then gave him the glass of water to drink from.

Natsu was asleep within minutes allowing Porlyusica to continue brushing the paste against the charred and blistered skin without any interruptions.

Happy continued to watch as Porlyusica worked hard on Natsu's arm and gently wrapping the arm loosely in bandages. When she finished Happy padded over to Natsu's bed and curled up in his left arm and soon he too was asleep.

Natsu's dream came in flashes, most of it was his birth parents, but then the dream shifted. Igneel falling out of the sky, to even newer events. He was in the guild and Zeref was in his Fairy Heart mode.

"_There's no need to apologize to Makarov. He's already dead." _Natsu slammed his eyes open. Taking a deep shuddering breath and realizing he was still in his bed in the infirmary.

Lucy's wounds were wrapped, and she was sleeping in the chair next to him with her head on his pillow. Happy was curled up in his left arm softly snoring. Natsu settled back down and fell asleep once again.

"You'll need to rest for at least a week to allow your wounds to recover and then we'll talk about what to have done with your arm." Porlyusica told Natsu sternly as he was getting ready to leave the infirmary.

It had been almost a week after the war and although many of the physical wounds had healed on Natsu and all of the other guildmates, they all still had a long way to go before they will be okay once again.

"And what if my arm doesn't heal?" Natsu asked the healer.

"I highly doubt that it won't ever heal, but you may need skin grafted later on at most." Porlyusica said as she secured the bandage that covered most of his arm. "Someone needs to put this paste on your burns twice a day," she said placing the jar of paste in his left hand. "And your arm should be wrapped, but not tight. If need be these are the painkillers that I have been using, if you are in pain take them. And lastly you need rest and I mean it." And with that Porlyusica allowed Natsu to leave.

When he exited, he spotted Lucy waiting right outside the infirmary, without a word she took the paste, roll of bandages, and the bottle of painkillers. "Come on Natsu I'll allow you to stay at my place."

The first thing Natsu did when they arrived was lay down in her bed and closed his eyes. The walk from the guild to her apartment wore him out, which wasn't all that surprising because he really hadn't been up walking around much at all over the past week.

"Do you need anything?" Natsu opened his eyes and saw Lucy standing over him.

"Just sleep." Natsu admitted closing his eyes again and this time he fell asleep.

Natsu didn't know how long he was asleep, nor did he remember what he was dreaming about. But a glance out the window told him he had been out for at least a good portion of the day. Natsu sat up using only his left arm and noticed that at the end of Lucy's bed Happy was curled up sleeping soundly. Natsu leaned forward and rubbed the blue exceed's head.

Natsu must have made at least some noise because when he looked up Lucy was walking towards the bed with a soft expression on her face. Natsu had also noticed that she had the roll of bandages and the paste in her hand.

"Porlyusica said that you needed the paste on your arm twice a day, right?" Natsu nodded as he slowly remembered the conversation that he had with the healer this morning. Natsu swung his legs over the side of the bed and started to unroll the bandage that was around his arm.

Natsu knew that Lucy was trying to be as gentle as possible, but it didn't stop the pain after the medicine was placed on his arm. Once the bandage was fastened around his arm Lucy stood up.

"What do you want for dinner?" Lucy asked Natsu as she helped him off the bed. To which Natsu mentioned that he didn't care.

Happy had joined them for dinner, and while they ate Natsu hoped that it could stay like this for at least a few years. No black dragons out to kill them, no evil wizards wanting him to kill them. He wanted it to be normal again with him and his team going on adventures, but of course it would never be that easy.


	2. Chapter 2

Natsu hadn't been to the guild days. It wasn't like he was purposely ignoring them. In fact, his injuries were mainly the reason why he hadn't even left Lucy's apartment in the past few days. But the only other reason was being fidgeted in his hands. The silver locket. Lucy had been the first to find it before and at least assuming Natsu didn't want any of the guildmates to find out until he was ready, had taken it and brought it to him.

Natsu had told the members of his team who hadn't known, but the majority of the guild still didn't know about what he was. A demon. He opened the locket and saw the picture of him and Zeref.

A memory flooded into his memory.

_He was younger and he was in his mother's lap and she was reading him something. The front door opened, and his father yelled urgently Natsu had heard that language before but couldn't make out what his father did say. And then embers. They were everywhere. Natsu knew that it must have been the dragon embers Zeref told him about. _

_His mother tried to protect him, but he knew that it was useless, this was how he died. _

Natsu jolted up when he heard someone scream in his ear. Trying to escape what he saw Natsu rammed his back into the side of Lucy's mattress. Natsu was trying to get a hold of his breathing by focusing on Lucy. Her scent. It was one of the few things that always eased him. Lucy had her arms wrapped around him squeezing him gently. Natsu let out one last shuddering breath before returning the hug.

The next day Natsu was back in the infirmary being observed by Porlyusica. Lucy held Happy in her arms as they watched it.

"The other wounds are healing up nicely." The healer said as she tapped a piece of gauze over Natsu's chest wound.

"But," Lucy said as the pink haired women continued inspecting Natsu's burned arm.

"The upper arm seems to be healing, but the farther you get down the arm the less it has appeared to be healing." Porlyusica released Natsu's arm.

"And what does that mean?" Lucy asked sitting forward as Happy gave a sad mew.

"I'll give it another week before recommending him for skin grafting." Porlyusica started to pack up her items. "In the meantime, continue to put the paste over the lower arm and fingers." And with that Porlyusica left.

Natsu, who had been almost silent the entire time, put his vest back down and stood up from the infirmary bed. Lucy noticed that the bags underneath his eyes were more prominent today then yesterday.

"Do you want to sit and talk or go back to my place?" Lucy asked walking over to him with Happy still in her arms.

"Your place." Natsu said quietly, which Lucy also realized that he had barely spoken over the past two days.

She understood that Natsu had gone through some rough things over the past two weeks. Although he hadn't told her the extent of what happened, and it was only about his fight against Acnologia with the other slayers. Lucy also knew that all of them had basically gone to hell and back twice within two years. But she didn't understand how he was as fine as he could have been two days ago and now, he was well almost silent.

The entire walk back to her apartment was spent in silence and with Natsu gripping his upper right arm. After entering Natsu went straight to her bed and laid down facing the window but made sure he wasn't on his right arm. Happy flew out of Lucy's arms and joined him and curled up at the end of her bed.

Lucy sat at her desk and pondered ideas for what she should write. Lucy had started a novel of her adventure's months ago when Fairy Tail was still disbanded and she wanted to think of the good memories. She decided to write about being reunited with Natsu, Happy, and the rest of her guildmates. Lucy didn't know how much time she spent writing but stopped when she heard a knock on the door. It was Ezra.

Lucy hadn't seen much of her guildmates or her team in the past week because she was making sure Natsu was okay and actually resting like Porlyusica had said he should. Erza looked almost fine, sure there were a few bandages still in some areas, but other than that she looked fine.

"Can I come in?" The swordswoman asked, Lucy stepped aside to let her in. "How has he been?" Erza asked pointing to a sleeping Natsu.

Lucy sighed bowing her head. "I'm not sure. He was as fine as he could be up until a few days ago when he became more withdrawn than he was that first week." Lucy explained to Erza.

"Do you know why?

"Not a single clue."

Lucy and Erza sat down at her kitchen table continuing their small talk. It was an hour later and they both had mugs of tea in their hands when they heard rustling coming from her bedroom. Looking up they saw Natsu, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with his left arm, walking into the kitchen. He took a seat and put his chin down on the table.

"Natsu do you want anything?" Lucy asked him as Erza looked at the dragon slayer curiously.

Natsu nodded his head. "Tea is fine."

Lucy stood up and walked to the counter and grabbed a mug from the cabinet. Lucy had also grabbed a muffin that she had made earlier.

"Eat." Lucy commanded as she set the mug of hot tea, muffin, and Natsu's bottle of painkillers in front of him and then retreated into the living room to grab the bandage roll and paste. Lucy worked on his arm as Natsu ate and talked with Erza.

It wasn't until Erza mentioned that her mother created dragon slayer magic that Natsu flinched. It was barely there and if Lucy wasn't wrapping his arm, she wouldn't have even noticed. Lucy looked up to see if Erza noticed, but if the red haired woman had noticed she did a good job of hiding it.

Erza left several hours later and it was then that Lucy noticed how late it had gotten. While cleaning up the mugs off the table she saw that Natsu had passed out.

Lucy gently eased Natsu up and out of the chair and into her bed.

"Sleep well Natsu." She said after slipping under the covers next to him. Happy stood up from his spot at the end to lay in between her and Natsu. Petting his head Lucy said, "you too, Happy." And she fell asleep praying for a night with no nightmares.


	3. Chapter 3

Under Porlyusica's very watchful eye Wendy was able to heal the rest of Natsu's burns. But the pink haired healer still insisted on having the paste applied to his fingers.

"It's just precautionary." She said grabbing a blue stress ball out of her bag. "Use this so you can start rebuilding the strength in your arm and hand." She told Natsu placing the ball in his right hand. "Be careful over the next few days, Wendy might have healed the external burns, but I don't know how far the burns went internally. The last thing we need is for you to damage your arm again. Understand?"

Natsu nodded and Porlyusica allowed him to leave. Leaving the guild hall he headed down to a familiar apartment on Strawberry Street. It allowed him to process a lot including his newly discovered memories. Natsu didn't really want to tell anyone about it because there were not a lot of people that new what he truly was and even fewer new about his relationship with Zeref.

Since the end of the war Natsu had been getting flashes of memories of his life that he didn't remember. Some were of Igneel, some were those supposed meetings Igneel and the other dragons had, but the worst were the ones of his blood family. Natsu was conflicted when it came to the. He always knew that he _had _real parents, but now that he was remembering them, he didn't know if he should think of them the way he thought of Igneel. Natsu gripped the stress ball tighter as he approached the apartment.

Natsu knew that she was worried and that he also should probably tell her sometime, well both her and Happy. They deserved to know, but he just didn't know how to tell them. Especially because when he was talking with Wendy if she remembered anything that happened before she had met Grandeeney, she looked shocked and told him 'no'.

Natsu opened the door to the apartment, he had taken to using the door instead of the window due to his arm being burned. He hoped that he would soon be able to have the strength to barge through the window soon.

Lucy was hunched over her desk when he arrived. Natsu smiled, he knew about the story she was writing, hell he even read it several times through the past few weeks while he healed. Lucy didn't know about that and he planned on never telling her because he was certain that she would kill him.

Lucy didn't notice his arrival until he looked over her shoulder to see what she was writing. She let out a sigh once she realized that it was just him.

Natsu talked about his check up with Porlyusica as she made tea. It wasn't until they both had mugs of the herbal drink in front of them that she looked him in the eyes and asked him to tell her about his memories of Igneel.

Natsu chocked up at that. He had barely spoken of Igneel before he died, but now. Natsu spent most of that year of training not mourning the death of his adopted father. And now so soon after finding out the truth of his birth and the fact that Igneel had also been a sensitive topic for him since he came to Fairy Tail.

"It's not that you have to tell me right now, but I want to put them in my book." Lucy explained looking down at her hands that were clasped together in her lap.

Natsu brought his gaze down to his mug of tea. "It was Zeref who allowed Igneel to raise me."

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Lucy perk up. "Natsu you don't need to- "

"No you deserve to know about it." Natsu took a shaky breath and decided to tell her. He spilled it all out the memories of his birth parents, his death, how Zeref brought him back, how he remembered things that his fellow slayers didn't remember, how her ancestor Anna was the one to make his beloved scarf. Finally Natsu talked about how he didn't know how to feel about his parents and Zeref. "He was my brother, should I love him? Or should I hate him for what he did to me?"

Natsu, who had stopped holding in the tears shortly after he began, looked up when Lucy grabbed his hands.

"I can't tell you how to feel, but maybe after time passes, you'll be able to see why Zeref did what he did. Plus if he never resurrected you, I wouldn't have met you, Happy might have died out in the forest. And who knows how many of us wouldn't be here because you saved us." Lucy said calmly still holding his hands.

Natsu looked up at her with a small smile on his face. "I'll tell you more about Igneel too, just not right now." Natsu said as he looked out the window and saw that the sun was beginning to set.

They were sleeping in Lucy's bed. Happy at their feet, Natsu facing the window and Lucy facing away from him. It started at out as a pleasant dream, any dream with Igneel was nice for Natsu. It changed though, to one less than pleasant. He was facing Gray, who's body was covered in the black markings of his Demon Slaying magic, had leapt forward and attacked him. They were fighting each other. A few moments later Natsu had gotten a lucky hit. Gray fell to his knees blood spilling from the wound. And Natsu let out chuckle as he watched Gray die.

Natsu's eyes snapped open and before he realized it, he was on the floor and Lucy was looking at him with concern. But Natsu was too busy trying to breathe.

_In and out. In and out. _The mantra continued in his head until his breathing evened out. It was then he became aware of the looks of concern that Lucy and Happy were giving him. Natsu ignored them and looked at his hands which weren't black, nor did they have blood on them.

Natsu let out a sigh of relief over the fact that it really was just a dream.

"Natsu?" Lucy asked him as she moved closer to look at him. Happy had at one point moved into his lap, probably thinking that it would comfort the dragon slayer.

"'M fine." He mumbled setting Happy on the bed before going under it's covers.

Lucy took it as a sign that he wanted to drop the subject and curled up next to him, their backs touching once more as she let sleep consume her again.


End file.
